Loss
I found out today that a friend is moving - soon and far away: far enough way that any contact will be electronically and probably eventually reduced to the exchanging of Christmas cards.
Loss is numbing - I guess that's the beauty of shock, it allows you to go on doing all that your day demands as your heart assimilates little by little what has happened.
As this fact cuts into my heart, I've started thinking about the ramifications of this to my future as I recall how important what is now lost, has been to my past.
Clinically there are stages of grief - I've read them, worked through them with the deaths of in - laws and a parent. This isn't death but it's still grief. Like the loss of a job, or health, or a house to fire, or a car in an accident, or all the things we just assume will never change, it shakes us when suddenly what has been the norm, isn't.
I'm remembering occasions that I didn't know it would be the last time, and consequently planning to fully invest myself in the time there is remaining - which is a valuable gift - knowing that good-bye is coming but there is still some time before it's said.
It's no wonder that from these experiences we gain more motivation to live and love as fully as we can while we are alive, while those we love are still with us; though our children are often so needy and caring for parents is wearing, and to spend time with friends takes more time to arrange than can actually be spent together, and a "date night" with our spouse had been nothing more than a good idea for months...
Nevertheless we do have today and we are not guaranteed tomorrow - not in our own lives or the lives around us.
I plan to be more vocal, at least in these numb moments, to make sure I say and show to those who surround me how rich my life is because of them.
Loss is numbing - I guess that's the beauty of shock, it allows you to go on doing all that your day demands as your heart assimilates little by little what has happened.
As this fact cuts into my heart, I've started thinking about the ramifications of this to my future as I recall how important what is now lost, has been to my past.
Clinically there are stages of grief - I've read them, worked through them with the deaths of in - laws and a parent. This isn't death but it's still grief. Like the loss of a job, or health, or a house to fire, or a car in an accident, or all the things we just assume will never change, it shakes us when suddenly what has been the norm, isn't.
I'm remembering occasions that I didn't know it would be the last time, and consequently planning to fully invest myself in the time there is remaining - which is a valuable gift - knowing that good-bye is coming but there is still some time before it's said.
It's no wonder that from these experiences we gain more motivation to live and love as fully as we can while we are alive, while those we love are still with us; though our children are often so needy and caring for parents is wearing, and to spend time with friends takes more time to arrange than can actually be spent together, and a "date night" with our spouse had been nothing more than a good idea for months...
Nevertheless we do have today and we are not guaranteed tomorrow - not in our own lives or the lives around us.
I plan to be more vocal, at least in these numb moments, to make sure I say and show to those who surround me how rich my life is because of them.
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