Wednesday, February 27, 2008


2008 has been such a relational year so far for me. I set up a Facebook account and from there discovered high school and college friends and even kids I used to baby-sit who now have growing families of their own.
It’s been a time of reconnecting to people I never knew I’d have contact with again and it’s been interesting to see how we are the same people today that we were twenty years ago; only a little more worn out from use!

When I was a child, I remember hearing in a sermon that in your life you will be lucky if you can count the number of true friends you have on one hand.
That was preposterous to me!
One hand? Five friends? I had way more than five friends!

Of course I didn’t have the perspective at twelve that I do now.
Now I understand.
My definition of friend has matured with my years and I am so blessed by those “friends” who have matured along with my definition.

Is there any thing in this world as amazing as a friend? One with whom you can open your soul and know they are trustworthy and kind?

There are so many people we brush shoulders with,those we work or play with, attend church with, do programs and worship, work on projects together, cheer on kid’s teams and complain about aching backs and knees as we endeavor to keep playing some of those sports from our youth. These relationships are great and fun and vital and fill that social need but then the project or season ends, we change jobs, or churches, or sports teams and we disconnect, and it’s okay.

Yet, I have friends who have moved far away from where I am, yet, nothing’s changed. We may not meet for lunch anymore but we’re still connected. I have a friend that will be moving soon and I hope she knows that we may communicate a little differently but our friendship will not change.

I got an email about simple and real friends and I loved it – here are the ones that ring true for me:

A simple friend, when visiting, acts like a guest.
A real friend opens your refrigerator and helps himself.

A simple friend has never seen you cry.
A real friend shoulder is soggy from your tears.

A simple friend doesn't know your parents' first names.
A real friend has their phone numbers in his address book.

A simple friend brings a bottle of wine to your party.
A real friend comes early to help you cook and stays late to help you clean.

A simple friend hates it when you call after they've gone to bed.
A real friend asks you why you took so long to call.

A simple friend seeks to talk with you about your problems.
A real friend seeks to help you with your problems.

A simple friend thinks the friendship is over when you have an argument.
A real friend calls you after you had a fight.

A simple friend expects you to always be there for them.
A real friend expects to always be there for you!

Don’t you love the last one? That there are people in your world who are not thinking “what can they do for me?” but are thinking “what can I do for them?”
It’s incredible to find a friend like that, a very rare and precious thing indeed.

Are you thinking of someone right now? I hope so. If there is, stop reading,go, and let them know how important they are to you.

But before I go, I should add my own definition to this list:
A simple friend knows you write occasionally.
A real friend has a subscription to your blog, has just finished reading this, and recognized that you were talking about them!


Kathy D said...

Thanks for being a 'true' friend!

Karen said...

I love your blog, and I love you! Thank you for not only writing about it, but for showing me what a real friend is!

aspiemom said...

Oh--that was so cute! (is that Kathy from Coffee Break?)

Jill said...

I've always said that you're the creative one. God had richly blessed you with the gift of writing. You're the "Anne" to my "Diana". "A (true) friend loveth at all times". Thank you for being my "boosem friend".

Love, Me